Five Inner Truths That Keep Finding Me
Over the years through my own inner work, mistakes, healing, and countless conversations with others a few truths have revealed themselves again and again. They’re not techniques or tools, but deep understandings that continue to shape my life and my work as a therapeutic coach.
I share them here not as advice, but as invitations. Each one speaks to something I’ve had to face in myself and something I see in almost everyone I work with.
I’m not trying to teach or fix anything just sharing what’s felt true, in case it stirs something useful in you too.
1. You are not your thoughts but your thoughts shape your life.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose.” – Viktor Frankl
What we unconsciously believe shapes our felt experience of ourselves and the world. Many of us move through life shaped by old patterns from childhood that we’ve never stopped to question. If you never become aware of these stories, you will mistake them for truth, limiting your choices, relationships, and potential. Until you can observe your mind rather than be possessed by it, you’re not fully free.
2. The feelings we push down don’t go away they just find other ways to act out in our lives.
“What you resist not only persists, but will grow in size.” – Carl Jung
Unfelt grief, rage, shame, or fear don’t vanish they go underground. They show up as addictions, anxiety, overreactions, illness, or relational dysfunction. Self awareness requires emotional curiosity and understanding. Avoid your emotional life, and you’ll unknowingly sabotage your own.
3. You became who you needed to be, now you can become who you really are.
“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” – Carl Jung
As children, we all adapt to be accepted. We hide, reject, or exaggerate parts of ourselves to survive. It made sense at the time. But many adults never grow beyond these old roles and defences. Becoming whole means reclaiming what was lost, disowned, or silenced. Without this, you risk living a life that isn’t truly yours.
4. Growth feels like loss, because it is.
“The mind prefers a known hell to an unknown paradise - me (paraphrased)
Real psychological growth often hurts. It involves loss of identity, ego defences, illusions, or familiar suffering. Many people resist growth not because they don’t want it but because it threatens the comfort of what they know. If you expect change to feel good all the time, you’ll stay stuck. Real growth asks us to sit with the discomfort of not having all the answers.
5. Connection is the answer but it starts with Self.
“We are born in relationship, we are wounded in relationship, and we can be healed in relationship.” – Harville Hendrix
We long for intimacy, belonging, and love but often lack the internal foundation to sustain it. You can only connect with others to the extent that you are connected with yourself. Disconnection from your own needs, boundaries, or essence will ripple into all your relationships. Before anything can shift you have to meet yourself, honestly and kindly.
These aren’t just insights they’re lessons I’ve had to learn the hard way. Each one has opened something in me, more self-awareness, deeper connection, a fuller sense of being alive. They’re not quick fixes, but doorways I keep walking through.
And when I’ve ignored them?
I’ve felt it the disconnection, the restlessness, the sense that something essential is missing, even when everything “looks” fine on the outside.
In sharing these, I’m not offering answers just the truths I’ve had to meet in myself. In a noisy world, turning inward with compassion is a quiet revolution. And maybe, a way home.